Have you tried it?
First things first, let’s get one thing out of the way. We all masturbate. Or, to be more accurate, according to a recent survey GLAMOUR did, an overwhelming 91% of you do. Plus, 36% of you do it 2-5 times a week; which is a fairly regular date with your favourite sex toy; which 67% of you say you use.
Clearly, a majority of you view masturbating - not a sordid sexual secret - but as a vital part of your mental and physical wellbeing, which is why people are going wild for a new masturbation trend.
Mindful masturbation is being touted as the latest self-love and self-care trend that's thought to help you experience more sensual and intense orgasms, rather than quick bursts of pleasure. While having a quick orgasm can be convenient, advocates of mindful masturbation believe it should be treated as an art or sacred practice that demands time and concentration. Here, we break down everything you need to know about mindful masturbation, its benefits and how to do it at home.
What is mindful masturbation?
According to Billie Quinlan, co-founder of Ferly, mindful masturbation is a 'sensual way to explore your pleasure, get grounded in your body and escape your mind for a few blissful minutes'.
As well all know, mindfulness is the practice of becoming conscious and aware, of being present in the moment rather than distracted, so basically this is taking mindfulness one step further. "When applied to the way we pleasure ourselves it can help us move beyond a quick session and into a much deeper connection with ourselves which ultimately leads to more pleasure, a greater understanding of our bodies and a lovely way to relax." Basically, it's the real self-care we all need to stay a little bit sane in this craziness.
How do you do it / get started?
We often masturbate with toys in the same way over and over. This is completely fine but if you're looking to get something a little more from your sex life then introducing mindful masturbation could be just the thing you need, according to Billie.
"The best way to start is actually with your hands, which might feel strange if you've used a toy for ages, but using our hands and fingers can create a level of intimacy with ourselves that toys sometimes can't," she says. "The next step is to explore your body more holistically, so rather than focusing all your attention on your vulva and clit, start to explore your other erogenous zones from your head to your toe. The idea is to be curious, letting yourself feel every sensation and acknowledging what feels good and maybe not so good - in the future, this level of knowledge also makes you a much better communicator so that partnered sex can be really fulfilling."
Finally, she advises shifting your focus from achieving an orgasm and instead focus on your pleasure. Removing this goal releases any pressure and helps you relax deeper into the moment, apparently.
It can be daunting to try something new without any guidance which is where sexual apps like Ferly come in - try a guided masturbation, which takes the lead for you - or listen to a sensual story to get you going.
What are the benefits of mindful meditation?
Help you to unwind and destress
Increases your sexual confidence
Deepens your pleasure
Nurtures desire - spontaneous sex doesn't always happen, more often we need to build daily rituals that bring regular moments of sensuality into our lives
Written by Bianca London.
This article originally appeared on GLAMOUR UK.