With the Oscars only weeks away, we round up what we’ve learnt from the 2015 red carpets, speeches and performances.
The booty backlash has begun
2014 may have been Year of the Bun, hun – but so far red carpets have been all about the boobs. Need proof? How about the Golden Globes moment where the goddess formally known as JLo donned a boob-baring Zuhair Murad gown? Or when her co-presenter, Jeremy Renner, seemed only able to stop himself from visibly drooling by using his mouth to instead comment on her “globes”? (You can’t blame the man; at 45 Jen is proof that perhaps only Beyoncé is a more perfect human being.) Plus, the SAG Awards and Grammys saw a host of famous cleavage – including Nicki Minaj and Kim K: both bootylicious, both guilty of trying to break the internet, and both in gowns that covered up the rearview in favour of the front. Still, we’ll wait for proof in the form of a boob-inspired hit featuring Snoop Dogg before we call 2015 the Breast Year Ever, shall we?
Which beauty trend not to follow
Want to get in on that trend for plunging necklines? Then heed these words: you don’t need to glitter your boobs. Yep we’re looking at you, Kim Kardashian-West. A little bronzer, perfect. A touch of highlighter, just great. But a golden disco-ball worth of sparkle across your assets? Just not necessary. Leave the major glimmer to your get-up, not your makeup, girls.
Diversity is finally expected, not just suggested
History was made at the SAGs when Viola Davis ( How to Get Away with Murder, The Help) and Uzo Aduba ( Orange is the New Black) picked up Best Actress awards in their categories – the first time that both lead television awards have gone to women of colour. Finally! But, er, could someone please tell the Oscars? Out of its 127 nominees only nine are not white, and only 25 are women. A fact so obviously backward, that Neil Patrick Harris felt the need to tweet: “Here’s a wrap up of today’s #oscar nominee luncheon… They all look so white! #toosoon”. C’mon Oscars, get your act together.
Madonna still knows how to grab attention
What to wear to the Grammys if you’re an older pop monarch and have a new album to promote? A sexy matador’s outfit, of course! And, as if her fishnet stockings and plentiful cleavage weren’t enough, the original Material Girl also felt the need to bare her thong-clad bum to photographers. Her high-voltage performance only upped the ante as she swung from the ceiling, suspended by her crotch, while surrounded by a group of what looked like Maleficent’s well-muscled grandchildren. Really, how could we look anywhere else?
Look out for the Brits
Which isn’t a hard task when it means getting to stare at Eddie Redmayne’s magnificence. The star (those freckles!), is well on track to winning the Best Actor Oscar, but it’s his endearing acceptance speeches at the BAFTAs and SAG Awards that have really won our hearts. Also putting the Great in Britain was Sam Smith, who took home four Grammys but really won the night when he said, “It was when I started to be myself that the music flowed”. Cue a worldwide ‘aaaaw’ moment. Oh, and can someone please bring back Adele? We miss her.
Things stay the same, Kanye clearly never changes
No one’s forgotten Kanye’s “Imma let you finish” speech as Taylor Swift took home her 2009 VMA, have they? And, in what seemed like a clever moment of poking-fun at that fact, Kanye jumped onto the Grammy stage as Beck accepted the award for Best Album – only to laughingly jump off again. Mr West has a sense of humour? As it turns out, no. He later ranted backstage that the artist should have handed the award over to Beyoncé. There’s an important life lesson here, and thankfully it has little to do with Yeezy. It is this: you just can’t win everyone over, every time.
There will always be one (power) trip
Poor Jennifer Lawrence, in 2013 and ’14 the honour fell (pun intended) to her – both times tripping up at the Oscars. Let’s hope Naomi Watts’ stumble at the SAGs has taken care of it for this year’s award season. Is it bad that we still want to laugh? Yep, it’s terrible.
There is such a thing as cute couple overload
And this year’s awards shows were packed with them. Justin Theroux laughed adorably at Jen Aniston’s joke, and George Clooney told Amal, “I couldn’t be more proud to be your husband.” (Jealous? Us?) Beyoncé and Jay-Z shared a perfectly in-sync gasp as Kanye was, well, Kanye, and subtly reminded us of the perfection that was their dual performance last year. But the true cuteness injection came from Chris Pratt and Anna Faris as they presented a Golden Globe. Funny, down-to-earth and clearly in love – you’d hate them if you didn’t just want to hug them so much.
It’s official: Sia is nuts
So this may not be breaking news, but after her Grammy performance it can be safely said the Chandelier hit maker is more than a little mad. It wasn’t the oversized white wigs she sported, or even the Sia mini-me from her music video that did it. Nope, it was her decision to sing facing… the wall. All while Kristen Wiig danced crazily around her, in – you guessed it – a wig. That voice though. Totally worth it.
We need all the laughs we can get
Tina Fey and Amy Poehler hosted their third hilarious Golden Globes, but it was hard to forget they wouldn’t be back next year. We were reminded of the laughs we lost as stars paid tribute to the late Robin Williams’ comedic genius, and we deeply missed giggling at Joan Rivers’ cutting Fashion Police comments (although we probably gasped a whole lot less, too). Thankfully, the Oscars has done something right: Neil Patrick Harris is hosting! So suit up, ladies and prepare those tummy muscles, because with NPH at the helm awards season is bound to end on a (legendary) bang.
Meike Abrahams is a freelance writer and editor living in London. She’s only a little obsessed with Eddie Redmayne and Oreos. See more of her work at hey-meike-a.tumblr.com.
