It’s a question you might not ever have considered, but what would you do if your partner had to move away? Would you go with them if they asked or would you stay and consider long-distance dating? If your partner has to move town either for a job or personal reasons, and has asked you to come with them, here’s what you need to think about before hauling out your suitcase.
How long you’ve been together
Moving in together is a big step; moving away together is an even bigger one. Before you decide yes or no, you’ll need to think about whether the foundation you’ve built together is strong enough to withstand the major life change you’re both about to go through. If you’ve been together for a few years, then you’ll probably be OK; if you’ve only been together a few months, it might not be such a safe bet.
How willing you are to move
Do you actually want to move or are you only moving for your partner? If it’s the latter, how open are you to being in a new city, looking for a new job, making new friends, structuring a new support system? These are all important questions you need to ask yourself, because if you don’t have answers to them, you could end up becoming bitter and resentful as a result.
How good you are at working through problems
All couples go through tough times, and relocating is a tougher time than most. Your collective emotions will be running high, you’ll be stressed, you’ll be frustrated and you could end up taking your negativity out on each other. If you’re good at working through conflict together, it could help you grow as a couple. If not, you might want to consider if a move is really the best thing for both of you.
How far you’re willing to go in your relationship
Do you feel that this relationship could be ‘the one’? Or is it just ‘the one for now’? If you’re committed to your current relationship, and feel that it could go the distance, it’s important to discuss this with your partner so that you’re both on the same page. Otherwise, if you’re thinking marriage and they’re only as far as co-habitation, your move could eventually lead to a permanent move apart from each other.
So you’ve had your first fight as a couple, now what?