Can you wear that there? The unofficial rules of outfit etiquette

There are very few things the internet loves debating more than what somebody else decided to wear. A recent conversation around festival dressing got us thinking about something we don’t discuss nearly enough: outfit etiquette. Not dress codes in the old-fashioned, “you can’t wear that” sense, but the increasingly lost art of reading the room.

Because while we firmly believe in wearing whatever makes you feel good, there is something to be said for dressing with the setting in mind. The outfit you wear to groove at a music festival might not necessarily be the one you reach for at a family-friendly food festival. Your cinema look probably doesn’t need the same level of commitment as dinner at one of the fanciest restaurants in town.

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The Kota Festival, for example, is promoted as a family-friendly event for people of all ages, which makes it a very different environment from an adults-only party or late-night music festival.

So, what exactly are the unofficial rules?

Family-friendly festivals

A family-friendly festival is probably not the occasion for your micro bubble skirt. That doesn’t mean you suddenly need to arrive dressed like someone’s auntie at a Sunday lunch. Crop tops, shorts, mini skirts and sheer pieces can all work. It’s simply worth remembering that you’ll be sharing the space with children, parents and grandparents. Think cool, comfortable and fun rather than nightclub at 2am. This is particularly true for daytime food festivals, markets and community events, where the atmosphere tends to be much more relaxed.

It's also worth remembering you'll be eating, walking around and sitting somewhere less glamorous than you imagined. So, dress accordingly.

Music festivals: almost anything goes

Festivals are one of the best places to have fun with fashion. Body glitter? Absolutely. Tiny sunglasses? Sure. Cowboy boots that have never seen a farm? Why not. But your outfit still has to survive the day.

If you’re going to be standing for eight hours, those six-inch heels might become your biggest enemy by sunset. If the festival is outdoors, check the weather. And if you're planning an extremely elaborate outfit, remember festival fashion should be expressive, but functionality is also important

Fine dining

You don’t necessarily need a floor-length gown to eat a tasting menu, but arriving at a fine-dining restaurant in a club outfit may feel a little…misplaced. Some restaurants have explicit dress codes, so checking before you leave home can save you an awkward conversation at the door. Even when they don’t, the setting usually tells you what vibe you need to go for.

Casual restaurants

Your neighbourhood burger spot probably isn't expecting Fashion Week level attire. Casual restaurants are arguably the easiest places to dress for because almost anything goes. Jeans, trainers, leggings, sundresses, shorts — you're safe. The only real etiquette here is basic consideration. If you've just finished an extremely sweaty workout, perhaps shower before occupying a table indoors. And actual sleepwear should ideally remain at home.

The cinema

The cinema is a natural habitat for hoodies, tracksuits, leggings and oversized jackets. Nobody is expecting you to serve a look in Cinema 4 at 8pm on a Friday. But there is one surprisingly important wardrobe consideration: other people's view. Large hats, elaborate headpieces and hairstyles that add another 30 centimetres to your height might look fantastic, but the person sitting directly behind you may disagree.

The theatre

Theatre dressing has become far less formal, and you certainly don't need to arrive in black tie for every production. But, there's something lovely about making a little effort for a night at the theatre. Smart casual is usually the sweet spot. More importantly, avoid anything noisy. Your stacked bangles might be great at dinner but considerably less ideal when it jingles through somebody's favourite monologue.

Weddings

As a wedding guest, follow the dress code. Avoid wearing white unless you've specifically been told otherwise. Consider the cultural or religious setting. And don't arrive dressed as though you're hoping somebody mistakes you for the bride.

Funerals and memorials

This isn't really the moment to experiment with your most attention-grabbing outfit. Different cultures and families have different expectations around funeral attire, so context matters. Black isn't universally required, but clothing that feels understated, respectful and appropriate to the family's customs is generally the safest approach. When you're unsure, asking is always better than assuming.

The office

The modern office dress code can get a bit...confusing. One workplace's perfectly acceptable crop top is another HR department's emergency meeting. Some offices practically encourage trainers and jeans; others still expect traditional corporate wear.

Pay attention to the office culture, especially when you're new. You don't have to get rid of your personal style, but knowing the difference between what you'd wear to the office and what you'd wear to Cabo is useful.

And yes, this applies even if you only go into the office twice a week.

Places of worship

Whether you're attending church, a mosque, temple or another religious space, modesty expectations can differ significantly. If you're visiting somewhere unfamiliar, find out what is considered appropriate beforehand. Some spaces may expect shoulders, knees or hair to be covered. This isn't about agreeing with every dress convention. It's about showing respect when entering a space that holds particular meaning for other people.

The gym

Wear as little or as much as you feel comfortable exercising in. Sports bras, shorts, leggings and fitted gym sets exist for a reason. Gym etiquette has far more to do with hygiene and spatial awareness than the attire itself.

Use a towel. Wipe the bench after using it. Don't leave your belongings spread across three machines. And maybe rethink clothing that requires constant adjusting if you'll spend your entire workout pulling it back into position.

Family gatherings

Every family has its own rules. Some families wouldn't blink at the tiniest mini dress imaginable. Others will have three aunties discussing it before you've even made yourself a plate. You don't necessarily have to dress according to everybody else's preferences, but knowing the environment you're walking into allows you to make an informed decision. Sometimes keeping the peace for one Sunday lunch is simply easier.

Airports

Airport outfits have somehow become their own fashion category, but comfort still wins.

Layers are your best friend, shoes you can actually walk in are advisable, and anything that takes 15 minutes to remove in a bathroom need reconsideration. You can still look chic at departures. Just remember you may also be sprinting towards Gate C9 while carrying a tote bag, laptop and maybe a mini suitcase.

There will always be somebody who thinks your skirt is too short, your outfit is too loud or your aesthetic is inappropriate simply because it isn't what they would wear. That's not what we're talking about. Personal style should be fun. It should allow you to experiment, express yourself and occasionally wear something slightly ridiculous simply because you love it.

There’s a difference between somebody disliking your outfit and an outfit genuinely being mismatched with the environment. The easiest rule? Dress for yourself, but acknowledge where you're going.